Sunday, May 27, 2012

Holding Pattern ...

Ya'll. Life with a toddler is hard work. Unfortunately, our lives at the moment have been in a constant state of tantrums, whine-fests and all-things-two year olds.

Sometimes, that means that things that I enjoy doing, like taking a shower everyday and this blog, for example, have to get put on the back burner until I don't feel like I'm drowning every. single. day.

I guess, that has offended our readers, because "Anonymous" kindly informed me that: blog followers don't like only one or two blogs a month so I will be leaving this blog for ones that are updated at least once a week.


Here's the deal- life isn't always glossy pictures and witty banter about our daily routines. At least, mine isn't anyway. Sometimes, real life is... well real. And for us, it's really, really real.

I would apologize for it; but honestly, I'm not sorry. I don't feel like I need to apologize for being a parent, and a wife, and a housekeeper, and a family cook, and a family activity director and a doula and a friend.

Right now, Casey and I are in the trenches of parenthood with a baby who doesn't want to leave our sides. At any point during the day. Or night. Or any other time. Ever.

For the past few weeks, I've done nearly everything every day with my Lil' Shadow close at hand, including: sleeping, napping, brushing my teeth, putting on deodorant, attending to other, ahem, bathroom needs.

I sat through church today with her squirming on my lap, coloring any shred of paper she could reach, chatting and shushing her throughout prayers and communion; all because she couldn't be pried off my hip when we tried to drop her off at nursery. Last week, she screamed and cried for twenty minutes until Casey went back to get her... maybe it makes us bad parents, but letting our kid cry because she wants to be with us is just something we don't do.

There's this phrase that I tell my doula clients all the time: It's just a season of life. There will be a day that Beatrice Kate doesn't want her mama to hold her hand, to sing her our Goodnight Song, to kiss her boo boos or to even hold her while she saute's spinach over an open flame, while roasting a pork tenderloin and calling Casey to see when he'll be home (you thought I was kidding earlier about holding her 24/7 didn't you?). I see her growing out of the elusive "baby stage" a little more each day and it breaks my heart.

So, yes. I acknowledge that I'm a bad blogger. I owe you giveaway results and pictures of my kiddo splashing around in her backyard Redneck Riviera, maybe a Pinterest find or two. I have three thousand pictures and blog topics all written up and ready to go in my head. And right now that's where they're going to stay for a bit.

Because when push comes to shove and I have to choose between writing about our day or singing and rocking my baby for what feels like the 5th hour in a row... well, I hope you know which one I'll choose. Hang tight, loyals. I'll get back on this train sometime soon. I promise... ok, well, I'll really make a better effort at least...

Besides, you guys don't want me to pull the Preemie Card again do you? 'Cause I totally will.



  1. I'm right there with you and I feel every word. High five Mama! :D

  2. You're an awesome mom, Ashley. Beatrice Kate is lucky to have you. And, I totally know what you mean about having someone attached to you all.the.time. I get it! Enjoy your weekend.

  3. Um you don't owe anything to any of us readers! Blogging should be a fun endeavor. Don't stress about it and just do your thing!

  4. At the end of the day, your family has to be your top priority. They are the ones who will always be with you. Thank you for being so honest and we can definitely wait until your life is less hectic! :-)

  5. I am totally a lurker that just found your blog, but I want you to know that my baby just turned 9 today and NEVER will you regret holding onto her just one more time. You will never regret holding her during church and never will you regret rocking her for the 5th hour in a row. :-) I know by reading that you already know that but my mommy heart breaks not to have a baby to hold tonight. Your baby is sooooo blessed that you lay down everything to hold her and she will not forget.