Monday, August 22, 2011

Miss Manners ...

There once was a day when we worried about Bea's nutrition choices. Remember this? Or how about this? Today we're happy to report that Beatrice Kate's diet has become quite varied and she's been eating like a champ for a while now.
I am NOT eating THAT. I've gotta draw the line somewhere you guys.
 In fact, now that we've got "Food-Items-Other-Than-Puffs" as mealtime staples we've moved onto to bigger battles. Things like table manners:
Yay! Actual foods with caloric values! Who knew they existed?
Table manners are a big thing to our family. We are Southern, after all. And, really, nobody wants to be the parents of the kid who causes a raucous at the family dinner table at Thanksgiving. So, in an effort to keep from being written out of Nana's will for smacking our lips or eating like cavemen, we've been working on our fork and spoon skills:
This is correct form, you guys, right? I don't wanna look stupid over here.
For the most part, it's going really, really well. We tried the typical baby-safe forks; but honestly, they didn't work that great and after a few tries, Bea got really frustrated and pitched a fit. So, instead we opted for the completely-unsafe-never-intended-for-children version from Crate and Barrel.

My kid eats her meals with an hors d'oeuvre fork and she rocks it:
Two food groups, one bite. Turkatermelon. *Bam* That just happened.
She'll eat anything off of the fork, including: turkey, eggs, onions, pepper, spinach leaves, melon, peaches, blueberries, etc. Sometimes though, the fork system just doesn't cram enough food into her gullet fast enough. So she resorts to The Shove to get it all in:
Watermelon, get in mah belly.

Chubby Bunny. Chubby Bunny. Chubby Bunny. See? I win.
Similar to her "screwdriver in a screw" theory, the more she contorts her mouth during the spearing parts of fork eating, the more likely she is to get a piece of food on it:
Food Item Identified.
Almost there:
Oooh, it's a slippery little devil, though.
And, success:
I'm awesome. And, you know it.
Of course, this is only just the beginning of Collins Finishing School. There will be many a lesson about No Slouching, Napkins in your lap, Don't slurp the so...Hey, wait. No Feet on the Table. That's a lesson too:
Chilaxin' at the dinner table. So. What.
Sigh. Oh, well. Like I said, we still have a long way to go, a very, very, very long way,before she's on her way to the Debutant Ball:
What? I can't help it if my toes like watermelon too, you guys.



  1. Lol, I just love the captions you put for pictures. It's really one of the few things I laugh about. Priceless! Oh and make sure turkatermelon gets into the dictionary. Cuz its awesome

  2. This little girl is growing up so fast! We miss seeing you guys! ~missy

  3. I just love your blog! I've been reading since Jan 2011 and you have the best sense of humor! And your little girl is just precious! Keep up the good work!