Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Humpty Dumpty ...

It was bound to happen sometime in her life and last night was the night. Beatrice Kate took a tumble off our bed as Casey was getting her ready for a nighttime story.

Before I go any further I need to confess two things about this potentially terrify turn of events:

1) Our bed is a platform bed, from IKEA, that is maybe 22-inches high:
2) Our always underfoot and incredibly annoying beloved 15-year old Collie mix, Arnold, was laying at the foot of the bed and took the full brunt of Beatrice Kate's fall. Meaning- she rolled directly off the end of the bed, from her back, onto her stomach. Fully splayed, she actually only fell a maximum of 8-12 inches; face-down onto the soft, billowy bed of smelly dog fir that is Arnold. For once in that dog's life, I was actually grateful for all fluffy undercoat that rotten mutt possesses:
 Anyway, I was not in the room at the time of the Great Spill. And, I swear I'm not telling you this because I want everyone to get a chance to make Casey feel even more guilty for the tumble occurring on his watch. No, instead... I'll use it as an example to illustrate the amazing-worst-case-scenario-powers of a Mother's Mind.

Here's what happened:
Casey: Oh. My. God [insert loud thud]
Ashley (from across the house): What the heck just happened? [Rushing into the Master Bedroom just as Beatrice Kate was drawing in the last of her 30 second pre-cry breath. Side Note: I think the amount of pause just before a baby cries is directly proportional to the amount of pitiful wail that will result]
Casey: She just tumbled off of the bed onto Arnold.
Ashley: What? She fell off the bed? Oh My God. We need to go to the ER rightthissecond. Give her to me. I need to calm her down so I can assess the situation (Side Note #2: I have no medical training. I don't know why I thought I could "assess the situation". Really, I had no business throwing around phrases like that)
Casey: Ashley, she's fine. She fell onto Arnold, like maybe 8 inches and she landed on her stomach.
Ashley: I think her head looks swollen. Does her head look swollen? What about her eye? Did she fall on her eye? Did she fall onto her arms? They could be broken. I should call 911. Do you think they can tell me if her arms are broken?
Casey: Ok, Please. Calm down. She's just scared. Just calm down so you can calm her down.
Ashley: I need to get her into a brighter room. Can you go get a flashlight so I can see if her eyes will dilate? Oh my god. She's acting sleepy. Casey, her brain is swelling. She COULD DIE. She just rubbed her eyes. That's defiantly the first sign of a concussion.
Casey: Uh, well it's her bed time and she didn't take an afternoon nap so maybe she's sleepy because SHE'S TIRED.
Ashley: What? Oh, maybe but she also probably has a concussion. I should call Amy (our NICU Nurse friend, who's friendship I totally abuse)
Casey: Call Amy if you want, but Bea's acting pretty normal now....

We both stop talking, look around to find our daughter, who has used this extra awake time to disassemble her mobile and start hiding pieces in her pajamas. After a few post-asleep checks by Mommy, Beatrice Kate did not, in fact, have a concussion and made it through the night just fine.

And so did I.



  1. The play-by-play is hilarious!! Glad she's OK. :)

  2. This sounds EXACTLY like me, a few nights ago, when Elliot half fell/hit his head. Except that I had nobody to talk me out of taking him to the ER, so I showed up, bawling my eyes out, sleeping baby in tow, blubbering about concussions and brain damage and....
    he was just fine. :)