Thursday, May 19, 2011

Mobility Madness ...

Remember this? Remember how I was so gushy and mushy about the fact that my "delayed" baby was now mobile? Well let's just say that the honeymoon for mobility has been bulldozed away. Now we're faced with the unforeseen challenges and mayhem that come along with a near-toddler.

Yep, I said: "near-toddler".Oh, sorry. Did I forget to mention the fact that in the same day Beatrice Kate learned to crawl, she also learned how to pull up and start cruising? Yea, well, she can.




And furthermore, she's freaking fast. For example: In the time it took me to walk into the bathroom to get a tissue, Beatrice Kate went from happily chewing her Veggie Sticks to zooming across the room, pulling herself up on our GLASS coffee table and was millimeters away from pulling over a cup of water onto my iPhone.


Her new-found mobility (both crawling and in a walker) has created a good bit of chaos around Collins Manor. Rolling over both directions combined with the ability to crawl makes diaper changes a little tricky now:
Notice how everything is laid out at the ready ...
Instead of whining to be picked up or held, she just brings herself to you to get her point across. Cue the Jaw's theme song:
Oh, Hi Mom.
Did you want some company?

Cause, I'm coming up either way ...
Life with a near-walker is also creating a few bruised ankles:
We've gotta put a bell on that thing (the walker, not the baby)
She's also becoming a little destructive with things around the house:
Yea, that's coming down ...
See? Told you.
She can even open drawers. That only took her about 0.000012 seconds to figure out, by the way:
Mission: Seek and Destroy
And shortly after, she devised a plan to open the freaking refrigerator. Seriously, this kid is like Baby Hulk:
Mighty Mouse in action, attempting to steal mayo
Let's hope she's going for the creamer instead of a beer ...
No one is safe anymore. Not even canines-which happen to be her favorite thing to chase and annoy:
Pulling his whiskers is only fun to her ...
This can only end badly ...
About two days into this new crazy world we found ourselves in, Casey and I went out to buybuyBaby and invested a small fortune in baby-proofing materials. Thank God that Dollar Diet was over, or she might have been duct taped to pillows and wearing a football helmet for protection. I will say that there are A LOT of crazy baby-proofing things to be bought, but we tried to limit ourselves with just the things we really needed. Of course, when you have a kid who figured out how to open the fridge and throw toys in the toilet within the first week- that "needed items" list is all relative. 

None the less, our biggest purchase had to be Bea's new Gated Community. Introducing a place Casey and I lovingly refer to as "Baby Jail":
All she needs is a little tin cup to rake across her bars ...
At first, it worked like a charm. Bea was safely gated into a small area with all her toys. In the meantime, I could scoot off to do important things like you know, GO TO THE BATHROOM once in a while. Then, she quickly (like she does with everything now) figured out that she could pull herself up on the gates:
It's like a cartoon. One second, she's far away ...
And in the next, she's standing behind you ...
Then, it wasn't too long after this innovation that she realized that with enough shaking, Baby Jail's defenses are weakened, and she can create an escape route for herself. So, we're basically back to where we started- bruised ankles, no kitchen hand towels and a potential disaster with Duke's mayonnaise. It looks like we will be closing in the space within Baby Jail so we can lock the gates together; hopefully creating a true "Confined Space".

And if all else fails, I'll just put her in a walker and send her to Mandrake and MiMi's house, where she can "Austin Powers" herself (Remember this scene?):
Not her most brilliant moment ...

If you have any baby-proofing advice, I'd love to hear it in the comments ...

No comments:

Post a Comment